I’ve been thinking about the facades (false or disingenuous personality traits we use to mask who we are) we unknowingly project into our environments. How does our false sense of self affect the lives we live? When we are living with facades, not only do we delay becoming ourselves fully, but we also create alternate realities within our lives that dictate unsatisfactory life outcomes. Why is it so hard to become who we naturally are? Our authentic selves. Facades inevitably trick us into thinking we are someone else. We begin attracting relationships, careers, and environments that align with our false selves, pulling us further out of alignment. How do we end this cycle and create more meaningful lives?
Some of my facades presented to the world based on my exterior behaviors and actions could be “high functioning,” “perfectionist,” “intense,” and “cares about her appearance,” yet internally, this is not how I feel nor how I relate to the world around me. My internal conversation: I do not think I’m high functioning (actually, I feel anxious and lonely today). Nothing I do is perfect, nor do I care about being perfect. I do not think I’m intense, but I feel stuck in my head. My outfit is a disaster today! But as these facades are presented, I unknowingly have the world thinking I am a confident, organized individual who has all my needs met in life. I may even get treated unkindly because the people and places around me assume all is well in my world. This girl doesn’t need a compliment or a smile! She’s doing just fine!
I have struggled to project who I truly am to the world around me. Of course, there are multiple reasons for this, but I am discovering how serious this lack of authenticity is. I have attracted people, places, relationships, and careers into my life that do not fit with who I truly am. How we present ourselves to the world and show up directly impacts what and who shows up for us. How we appear and feel can be at odds, which only brings us further away from living authentically, and when we aren’t living authentically, are we living?
I believe that living with facades can manifest as anxiety, depression, or addiction issues. We can begin to feel trapped within our false creation of self. Internally aching to be set free. We create our realities based on how authentic we choose to show up. If you keep saying you’re good when you’re not, whether in a job, a relationship, or internally, don’t expect the universe or anyone else to tear down that facade you’ve created. The only way to get more of what you want in life, to begin aligning, and to start genuinely receiving is to present your innermost self to the world around you. Ask for what you need. Shed some vulnerability and reach out for support. The more we lean on each other, the more authentic we become.
Start being, start receiving, and start living.